#ThrowbackThursday
I was, and still am, one of those girls who would become so inspired by music.
When I was little, my sister and I would put on performances for our parents, family members and visitors.
I love musical theatre. The first musical movie I remember watching as little girl was Pocahontas. After watching the movie, I was obsessed! I begged mum to buy the Pocahontas sound track, mum made me a Pocahontas dress and received a Pocahontas Barbie for my birthday.
I love broadway musicals such as My Fair Lady, The Sound of Music, Mary Poppins.
I have always loved to SING!
Here I am with my big sister Claire, most likely singing a Spice Girls song with our play microphone! In true little sister form, I was interested in and always doing what my sister was doing.
Looking closely at this photo, I see Claire is actually holding the microphone down to my level and sharing. I can really see the joy and excitement of just spending quality play time and experiences with her.
As I got a little older, my parent's would call me Annoya Twain because as I became older, all I would sing and dance to only Shania Twain. I was loud, I was all over the place dancing, rolling on the floor, kicking my legs, flipping my dress around. I was what people would consider annoying or a "feral child". Thinking about it now, I was in a state of pure joy!
As I grew older, I began to hear this narrative of "you're too loud" "you don't have to be the centre of attention" "you're annoying" "keep your legs closed" "stay close to me" over and over. I began to shrink to make people feel comfortable or to avoid upsetting others. I lost my sense of joy and excitement. I still loved to sing, but I would hide it from others. Only singing alone in the shower, in my room or as a young adult, driving in the car. In 2020, I'd had enough. As I began my journey in attending KunYin classes online 4 times a week, I put myself back into the spotlight. I was allowing others to see me for who I am. I was rediscovering parts of myself that I thought I had lost. I was dancing freely, taking up space, being seen. It took me some time and healing to begin to realise that perhaps the people who commented on my being "too loud" or "annoying" were insecure about their own talents or they were shamed in the past for shining their light in front of others.
I am now singing, dancing, swirling my hips and not giving a DAMN what anybody thinks! It is my life to live and nobody can take away my joy! I am allowing this joy to ripple into the universe and inspire all it comes into contact with.
This weeks question for you... What would be possible if I no longer cared what others thought of me? OR What have I achieved since letting go of caring what others thought of me? I would love to hear your answers in the comments below.
Have a fabulous week! Much love and many hip circles, Eliza <3
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